


If you can love somebody else, you can love yourself

by SarahNoel



Category: Skip Beat!
Genre: 278 SPOILERS, Absolute fluff, F/M, I am living, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-10
Updated: 2020-02-10
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:14:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22653082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SarahNoel/pseuds/SarahNoel
Summary: Picks up right where 278 left off, which means that this will be obsolete in less than 2 weeks, but whatever! I'm feeling things, and this is the result.Oneshot.
Relationships: Mogami Kyoko/Tsuruga Ren
Comments: 2
Kudos: 35





	If you can love somebody else, you can love yourself

**Author's Note:**

> *deep inhale*

Kyoko’s mouth slowly dropped open. A strange chill spread through her body. 

Tsuruga-san’s painful smile while talking to Bo… was about _her._

They had touched each other. She knew what his hair felt like, his arms, even the taste of his skin--in fact she knew, at least visually, every inch of his body.

But she hadn’t known his soul. If she had, she would have seen this. She should have _seen_ this. 

And in a way, she had. She had simply blocked it. His affection _had_ to be part of some playboy personality.

But it, it wasn’t. 

He…

She couldn’t breathe. Focusing on that for a moment gave her a flicker of reprieve. But he was still standing in front of her, and she had never wished more that he wasn’t. He was watching her, his mouth slightly parted, his _eyes._ The hope and love shining out of them burned away whatever personal demons were still lingering from her anger a few moments before.

“Mogami-san,” he said, “I like you.” He looked afraid when he finished saying it. It was incredibly human of him.

She gripped the rails in the elevator to prevent her legs from giving way under her.

“No,” she breathed, her vision clouding over. No. It was impossible. Like _her_? There was a huge distance between them, metaphorically. Literally, he was within arm’s reach, which was beginning to feel like torture. “N-no no no no…” She turned and rested her head in the cool metal corner of the elevator. That was almost a relief, but he was still behind her, his aura pressing silently at her back.

He’d gotten angry at her, several times. That was undeniable--and now, it was undeniably jealousy. His Genuine smile, it… that was for her, too.

This was cruel. She didn’t deserve this. Someone like her didn’t deserve this sort of heavenly reality. Maybe she could kiss a fairy prince, but only so he could fly away and be free. Maybe she could be Tsuruga Ren’s associate. But. She wasn’t allowed in. Not into his heart, or any kingdom of happiness.

“I’ll leave if you want me to.” His tone was miserable. Shaking, she unpeeled her forehead from the corner and let the silence stretch out.

“But,” he continued, “I want to hold onto that slight hope… that part of you feels the same way.”

She made a noise, somewhere between a sob and a bark of laughter. Part of her! Her insides melted, and her grip tightened on the rail. He was in _every_ part. He had crept into her bones in every way she feared and longed for. 

“Mogami-san?” he said after a beat. He sounded terrified. When she didn’t immediately reply, she felt him back away. “Oh god. I’m so sorry.” The _click_ of a button, and the elevator doors opened.

“Wait,” she whispered. The smell of cars and concrete wafted into the elevator, reviving her a little. She turned. He was walking away. “Wait!” she cried out, and he stopped in his tracks, only a few paces out of the elevator. His frame was stiff, formal. Angry. She could tell that even without seeing his face.

“Me too,” she said. “I f-feel the same way.”

His shoulders jerked so he was half-turned towards her, and his eyes, instead of angry, were full of fear.

“Please don’t lie to me,” he said.

If Tsuruga Ren were hers, she would not be able to resist that look in his eyes. Pleading. Like this was his last attempt in holding himself together.

Kyoko stepped out of the elevator and onto solid ground. As though that was what it was waiting for, the door slid shut behind her.

She took another step forward, and began to hold out her arms. His eyes widened in absolute shock.

And then she was in his arms, holding tightly to his waist, her face pressed against his chest. Which one of them was trembling? She could hear his heart. His arms enveloped her, she could feel his cheek against the top of her head. She wished desperately that she could hold more of him. She adjusted her grip, trying to pull him down to be even closer. Somehow she had managed to get her arms under his suit coat, so all that separated her hands from his warm skin was a thin layer of fabric.

He felt so real. This was real.

“I’m sorry I got angry with you,” he said. His voice vibrated against her ear. “I do that too often.” Unexpectedly, he broke the hug and took her by the upper arms, looking desperately into her face. “I don’t want to hurt you,” he said.

She had no more instincts for this. She was an absolute mess, wanting at once to get away from him and also to kiss him wildly. She blinked at him, dazed.

“Mogami-san?” he said tentatively.

The elevator opened behind them, and he released her and took a step back. She could visibly see a mask slip over his face, calm and cool and absolutely fake. 

“Ren!” It was Yashiro, thank goodness. “Is everything alright? I wasn’t sure where you’d gone.”

“Yes,” Tsuruga-san said coolly. “She’s agreed to let us take her home today.”

Their brief exchange had given Kyoko just enough time to collect herself and follow his lead. She turned back to Yashiro with what she hoped was a calm smile. “Yes.” she bowed. “I’m sorry for troubling you earlier.”

Yashiro was looking hopefully between the two of them, but whatever answer he was looking for, it appeared their acting was enough to withhold it from him.

“It’s no trouble,” he said, staring at Tsuruga-san like he was now trying to pry something out of him. “Shall we go?”

Kyoko stole a glance at Tsuruga-san, who now looked innocent as an angel. He looked down at her, and they both froze. His mask cracked.

“Yes,” Kyoko said quickly, turning back to Yashiro. Her face was hot. “Where are you parked?”

Yashiro looked suspicious again, but Tsuruga-san turned and pointed. “This way.” And he strode off in that direction. 

The car ride home was completely silent, and Kyoko found it suffocating, until she saw movement out of the corner of her eye. Tsuruga-san had placed his hand on the seat between them, palm up, while staring resolutely out his window. Kyoko glanced at Yashiro, who had given up looking at them through the rearview mirror, but Tsuruga-san wouldn’t have offered if he was afraid of Yashiro seeing them. She slipped her hand into Tsuruga-san’s, and a jolt of electricity curled up her arm. She looked out of the window, schooling her features--perhaps the truest test she’d ever had of her acting abilities. Her pulse was pounding, he must be able to feel it through their hands. She focused her energy on that one point of contact, memorizing his touch. His hand was so much larger than hers, but all at once within the past hour he had become vulnerable, and all the more beautiful for that vulnerability.

He released her hand, and she glanced at him questioningly, folding her own hand calmly back in her lap.

“We’re nearly there,” he said by way of explanation. He smiled tenderly. Kyoko couldn’t help but smile back.

Yashiro pulled the car over in front of the Darumaya, and Kyoko thanked them both and went inside without a backward glance.

“Kyoko-san, you’re home,” Boss’s wife started, and Kyoko quickly bowed.

“Yes, but I’m not feeling great, so I’ll go directly upstairs. If I ask a friend over, would that be okay?”

“Yes, but…” her eyebrows furrowed a little. “Is this friend a girl?”

Kyoko felt herself turn red. “Yes! Of course!”

“Oh, good.” The woman’s face cleared. “When she comes in, I’ll let her know where you are.”

“Thank you.” Kyoko bowed again and went upstairs.

As soon as she was out of sight of other people, she collapsed to the ground. After a few shaking breaths, she texted Moko.

_I need you. Please come to my house as soon as you are available._

\--

_Fine. On my way._

Kotonami stepped into Kyoko’s room and decided to gloss over the fact that there was an enormous Fuwa Sho poster on the wall. Kyoko was collapsed right next to the doorway, phone open to their brief text conversation.

“Hey!” Kotonami said, shutting the door and kneeling next to her friend. “What gives?”

To her surprise, Kyoko replied in English, though it looked a little as though her face was melted into the floor.

“Ah, Kotonami-san. It’s good to see you. Welcome to my home.”

Kotonami stared at her for a moment, and then typed _kokuhaku_ into her phone’s translator.

“Did he finally… confess?” she asked.

Kyoko stared into space, and without another word, a small stream of tears slid down her face and into the floorboards.

**Author's Note:**

> Can you believe these two idiots. I have no idea how this is actually gonna go, but I had to work out at least one scenario. Thanks for reading!


End file.
